The write stuff

It can be hard for me to show my emotions sometimes..it's tough when you have the peace loving, lets not rock the boat, or upset people sanguine personality from your Dad constantly fighting with the dramatic, artistic, who cares what people think melancholy personality of your Mom. Basically this means that I have lots of emotions lots of the time and the desire not to frighten others with them. This week has not been a good week for my sanguine side. Emotions have poured past my carefully constructed barriers and flooded all the poor saps within my reach (sorry sweet roomy). Not all of them bad...not by any means. Actually I've been rather bipolar but not in the months of up and months of down kind of way...more like the running around the house laughing and dancing like a crazy person then lying down on the couch and sobbing irrationally. Is it weird that quitting your job can provoke such a dramatic response? Maybe. All I know is that I have never been happier or sadder t...

I've been keeping an eye on Alicia for a long time. It's tough to reach out to someone when they are thousands of km's away but thanks to Facebook and other such technology I can continue to keep some sort of connection with the only neice I've met (my brother has at least 1 girl that I know of that I'll likely never get to meet since she was adopted out). My brother was forcibly removed from the families house when my sister and I were about 7 years old. I'll never forget that day because it might have been the day I died. My Dad had confronted my brother about his bad behaviour and told him that he had to leave before he endangered our family. It was almost dinner time so my sister and I were seated at the dining room table and my Mom had just brought out the plates. My brother mumbled that he was going to grab the cutlery and my Dad saw him reach for a large knife. My Dad tackled him to the floor and once in control of him literally tossed him out the...

As a child I spent a lot of time dreaming about the kind of things I would do as an adult. My mind was constantly changing based on my personal interests at the time - vet, criminal profiler, engineer (designing rides for Disney), archaeologist, writer, etc. But one thing I consistently wanted to do throughout my childhood and into High School was act. I always loved the theater and movies and wanted to be a part of the stories. I loved how they created a place where people could face difficult questions, laugh at the absurdity of life, cry with the heros or heroines in their personal struggles, and feel all of the range of emotions in a short period of time. Like a good book it was both an escape and a way to face reality. In High School I joined the theater class and was excited to learn more about the art of acting. I also had a friend who's father helped aspiring actors get auditions who said she would ask him to help me out. Things seemed hopeful as they ...

Well it's been just over a week now since I got back from my vacation. When I look back it's clear that outside of the normal bumps of any vacation, it was a very pleasant one! My parents and I flew into Puerto Vallarta at around 4pm on Friday July 1. As we stumbled into the crowded airport and attempted to manuever our way through the throngs of sales people, the kissy faces of a number of Mexican men made me suddenly all too conscious of my "Kiss me I'm Canadian" shirt. Oh well, like anyone would dare try with my Mom nearby (she gives off very protective Mom vibes...I think it may be because she's very protective). Anyway after a run in with a sales man who had briefly convinced us he was our Sun Wing Rep, we managed to slump into a nice air conditioned bus that took us the 20 minutes or so to Riviera Nayarit and up to our Resort "Riu Jalisco". It took me a good part of the trip to realize that the "j" is Jalisco is pronounced "h...

I'm sure we've all been at this place before...I certainly have. Yet knowing that I have been here before does not bring much comfort at this point. Life is about to change...actually it has to change. My gut has been telling me this for awhile and I have been neglecting it. I've been choosing comfort and familiarity over listening to my gut because, though it is often right, I still have a hard time trusting it. Instead of my gut churning with frustration over my need to move on couldn't it just be indigestion? Maybe these nightmares are from watching too many scary movies? No, the huge tornadoes that threaten to kill and destroy everything I cherish, including my own life, in my dreams are not a symptom of eating dill pickles before bed but a symptom of helplessly watching as changes around me threaten to overwhelm me. Work has always been just work for me. It's always been a way to make enough money to live comfortably and pursue other interests, but now it foll...

Well it's that time in Canada again...time to vote for a party who the people trust to run our Gov't whether in a majority or a minority position. Typically I don't really choose sides in politics but I have found Harper's attacks on democracy have polorized my position enough to join the Liberal Party. It was a choice between them and the NDP. I like the NDP but the Liberal party won me over after I read Ignatieffs book, "True Patriot Love". I think that with a little experience Ignatieff could actually become a good Prime Minister - he has the right tools, beliefs, and ethics. Of course so did harper when he first started. I just can't stand by and watch as Canada changes into a Nation that I am no longer proud to call home. Choosing to be a Liberal in Alberta is not easy. It means fighting harder and losing. Having Nenshi elected as our cities mayor gave me a glimpse of hope that Calgarians may be ready for change. I guess we'll see just how ready ...

When I made a goal of taking my health into my own hands and spending money on seeing a naturopath, I promised myself that I would take his or her advise seriously and make any necessary changes - I just didn't realize how hard it would be. I went to the Calgary Centre for Naturopathic Medicine for an initial consultation/medical and was eased by the relaxed and informative environment I found myself in. It was well designed with nice leather chairs in the waiting room and friendly staff but very busy. Apparently lots of others have decided the same thing I have - orthodox medicine does not have all the answers. Of course that does not negate it's importance but it does leave one with ambiguous symptoms like fatigue and headaches searching for more then the usual looks of pity from doctors who no longer know what to precribe for you. Also there's nothing quite like coming precariously close to death to awaken one to the importance of caring for oneself. I sat down across...