Skip to main content

Alicia


I've been keeping an eye on Alicia for a long time. It's tough to reach out to someone when they are thousands of km's away but thanks to Facebook and other such technology I can continue to keep some sort of connection with the only neice I've met (my brother has at least 1 girl that I know of that I'll likely never get to meet since she was adopted out).

My brother was forcibly removed from the families house when my sister and I were about 7 years old. I'll never forget that day because it might have been the day I died. My Dad had confronted my brother about his bad behaviour and told him that he had to leave before he endangered our family. It was almost dinner time so my sister and I were seated at the dining room table and my Mom had just brought out the plates. My brother mumbled that he was going to grab the cutlery and my Dad saw him reach for a large knife. My Dad tackled him to the floor and once in control of him literally tossed him out the door. My sister and I hadn't seen the knife and didn't know about our parent's decision to toss Sean out so this violent scene was scary and confusing.
My brother had been a problem for as long as my young mind could remember. He tortured my sister and I from the time we were born and often came home drunk or high or occasionally covered in blood. My parents were at a loss for how to help or control him so they did what they felt they had to do to protect our family.

Years later when I was around 12 my brother returned from the streets of Calgary desperate for a place to stay with his young pregnant girlfriend. My parents saw some positive changes in him and wanted desperately to help this baby have a better life so they took them in. I was so excited when Alicia was born. She was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. I felt honored to be given the opportunity to bathe, dress, and change this little miracle and liked to pretend I was her Mom when I strolled around our neighbourhood with her. I don't quite remember how old she was when Sean moved her and her mom with him to an apartment in Calgary but it wasn't until years later that they moved to Ottawa. She was such an adorable toddler and grew more smart and beautiful every year. I was sad when they moved far away and took a few opportunities in my early adulthood to fly out and see them.

Things got awkward though when I could no longer maintain a healthy relationship with my brother. I made a tough decision to shut him off fully from relationship with me as did my sister. Its complicated but I still love Alicia (and my Nephew Joshua that I've only met a few times). Joshua is currently out of my reach but Alicia lives with her Mom and her Mom was always nice to Angie and I. Alicia needs family right now...she had something traumatic happen to her recently and needs a good support system to overcome the pain and fear of post traumatic stress. I've tried to be one of those supports for her online but saying hugs and giving someone hugs are two very different things. I talked about going out there to see her but I wasn't sure how that was going to work.

About a week ago my brother in law Isaac talked to her on facebook and invited her out here to stay with them for a week. She asked her Mom and her Mom said yes! My Mom offered to pay for the flight and suddenly the neice I was afraid I might never see again is arriving in Calgary tomorrow! I can't wait to see her all grown up and to connect with her!  

Comments

  1. MichelleAugust 11, 2011 at 8:14 PM

    I'm really excited for you! I hope you have a wonderful visit.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Excursions in beautiful Riviera Nayarit!

Well it's been just over a week now since I got back from my vacation. When I look back it's clear that outside of the normal bumps of any vacation, it was a very pleasant one! My parents and I flew into Puerto Vallarta at around 4pm on Friday July 1. As we stumbled into the crowded airport and attempted to manuever our way through the throngs of sales people, the kissy faces of a number of Mexican men made me suddenly all too conscious of my "Kiss me I'm Canadian" shirt. Oh well, like anyone would dare try with my Mom nearby (she gives off very protective Mom vibes...I think it may be because she's very protective). Anyway after a run in with a sales man who had briefly convinced us he was our Sun Wing Rep, we managed to slump into a nice air conditioned bus that took us the 20 minutes or so to Riviera Nayarit and up to our Resort "Riu Jalisco". It took me a good part of the trip to realize that the "j" is Jalisco is pronounced "h...
1 comment
Read more

Community Theatre is Failing Women

I have grown decidedly more Feminist in my thinking over the years which has made enjoying theatre harder to enjoy lately. There are, of course, excellent shows with diverse and interesting female casts but more often then not, the female characters are flat and uninteresting. It seems like Theatre show creators, performers, and viewers are often more liberal than the average community of people but strangely, despite this, sexism is still rampant. Something I often think about when viewing TV shows and Movies is whether or not what I am viewing would pass the Bechdel Test. The Bechdel Test, for those who are not familiar, was created by Alison Bechdel in her 1985 comic, “Dykes to Watch Out For” and has become a well-known measurement of gender bias in movies. Basically to pass the test the movie must have three things: Two female characters (preferably named), Who talk to each other, About something other than a man. When I first learned about this test...
Post a Comment
Read more

Inspiration

I don't know if this is something that everyone does or not, but I have a stack of movies that I go to when I need inspiration. I guess they might be among my favorite movies, but it's more than that. These movies are the one's that give me something that I need at the time whether it be hope, joy, courage, or inspiration. Each one touches me in a different way. These are the movies that I will likely watch at least once a year and in some cases many times in a year. Do you have a movie or movies that do the same for you? Maybe it's a romance that reminds you that love is real and possible, or an action that pumps you up and makes you feel like you can do anything. Here's my list! 1) The Lord of the Rings Trilogy 2) Pride and Prejudice 3) The Sound of Music 4) Sister Act 1 and 2 5) Gone with the Wind 6) Yentl 7) Bruce Almighty 8) The Phantom of the Opera 9) Up 10) Tangled (new to the list) There are probably a lot more, but I can't think of them o...
1 comment
Read more